And we're back....

Uhg, Im exhausted. Emotionally and physically.

My mom just completely exhausts me.
It happens most of the times that I go up there. I go to my dad's, talk about old times and inevitably get reminded of all the selfish crap my mother pulled when I was a teen (and when I was a kid but the stuff when I was a teen was bad) and my step-mom talks about all that crap and reminds me of stuff I had forgotten. I fight back tears and just act like it doesnt bother me, which is exhausting. Then I go and see my mother and pretend that I dont remember any of that crap. Hell, I have to pretend that I dont even know about most of that crap because if I brought it up she'd just cry and say that my father is brainwashing me. Uhg. So I smile and pretend Im having a great time and count down the minutes til I can go back to my dad's. Kael bites his tongue and tries not to go off on her for all the crap she did to me and put me through.
My shoulders hurt now from nerves.
And the highlight of my conversation was my mother talking about the increasing infertility rates (she knows we are TTC but not that we are having trouble) and my mother laughed when I told her that there is a school of thought that thinks the increasing cases of PCOS are caused by either an increasing number of women having a heightened awareness of their bodies and therefore are more likely to go to a doctor and seek help OR because of processed foods and perhaps hormones in meats and such causing who knows how many problems. She laughed and said "Some people will believe anything huh? Maybe its just because people these days always want to gripe about something, or just because more people in the world are fat. I bet if every one in the world lost 20 lbs, the cases of crap like that would go down". Kael had to hold my hand because I was fighting the urge to slap her.

I got my furniture back, though. And lots of other random crap from my childhood. I dont know what to do with that stuff. Its like journals from 1st and 2nd grade and old sketch books and things like that.

Kael isnt sure how the interview went. Some things seem to have gone poorly, while others seem very promising, so we are confused.

So, we are back home, back in limbo, back in normality.

hopefully we can find the energy to BD every night for the next week and make this clomid do its job.